The menswear collections for Fall 2006.Dolce e Gabbana again steal the limelight, not so much for their clothes - that gear can't be worn by just any body, only those stupid hip hop designs can - but their choice in runway models.
January 28, 2006
It's that time of year again
The menswear collections for Fall 2006.Dolce e Gabbana again steal the limelight, not so much for their clothes - that gear can't be worn by just any body, only those stupid hip hop designs can - but their choice in runway models.
January 24, 2006
Team America: F*** yeah!
There really was no escape from eventually watching "Team America: World Police", especially since I am such a fan of Thunderbirds and Captain Scarlett - the puppet versions, naturellement. I've always suspected Col. White was the boss of Lt Green, the way the Col. always expected his every whim attended to. And for Scarlett and Blue, well, they were spending so much time cooped up in their ship voluntarily even the usual excuse of situational homosexuality didn't really stick.
I was curious whether it would be as campily funny as the Gerry Anderson art work, and, of course, it was not: it was all rather crude and predictable once the premise of "trying to offend everyone" has been made clear. On the other hand the film was technically and cinematically done gorgeously.
If only they had some funny Brits working on the script it would have been twice as funny. The so-called controversial puppetry sex scenes I thought were rather vapid and tame. I mean, how hard is it for puppets to get wood? Surely there would have been gags lurking in there, but no, on screen sex apparrently (judging by the sheer number of mentions of this scene in film reviews) is taken very seriously. Not much, though, about the hilarious gay blowjob scene.
At the other end, the vomit scene was done better in Meet the Feebles.
My gaydar was going off hugely when watching the accompanying interview with Trey Parker and the behind the scenes documentaries on the DVD extras. All those gay/homo/homophobia references, also very noticeable in South Park, point to a knowing.
I was disappointed that one scene was cut: where Gary comes up after giving his boss a blowjob to prove he's with them (I shudder to think President Bush will instigate a similar test to prove your loyalty and patriotism) and the boss says: "You're gay now".
If only one had scenes like that in action movies involving Vin Diesel of Bruce Willis in that situation, it may make them watching worth my while. Vin wiping his chin after a blowjob would be worth the admission price by itself.
You can establish "how f***ing American are you?" here.
Here's my score:
Too right!
I was curious whether it would be as campily funny as the Gerry Anderson art work, and, of course, it was not: it was all rather crude and predictable once the premise of "trying to offend everyone" has been made clear. On the other hand the film was technically and cinematically done gorgeously.
If only they had some funny Brits working on the script it would have been twice as funny. The so-called controversial puppetry sex scenes I thought were rather vapid and tame. I mean, how hard is it for puppets to get wood? Surely there would have been gags lurking in there, but no, on screen sex apparrently (judging by the sheer number of mentions of this scene in film reviews) is taken very seriously. Not much, though, about the hilarious gay blowjob scene.
At the other end, the vomit scene was done better in Meet the Feebles.
My gaydar was going off hugely when watching the accompanying interview with Trey Parker and the behind the scenes documentaries on the DVD extras. All those gay/homo/homophobia references, also very noticeable in South Park, point to a knowing.
I was disappointed that one scene was cut: where Gary comes up after giving his boss a blowjob to prove he's with them (I shudder to think President Bush will instigate a similar test to prove your loyalty and patriotism) and the boss says: "You're gay now".
If only one had scenes like that in action movies involving Vin Diesel of Bruce Willis in that situation, it may make them watching worth my while. Vin wiping his chin after a blowjob would be worth the admission price by itself.
You can establish "how f***ing American are you?" here.
Here's my score:
Too right!
January 21, 2006
As the T-shirt said: Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy
Leather chaps, stetsons and tassled jackets never did it for me, so I have always been avoiding western bars, western movies and western clothes. Too alien, too rural, too American.
Every time I have been to America - only twice for more than one night's stay - it has been a disappointing and depressing experience: I've encountered far more snobbery and contempt for the way I looked, dressed or talked in the USA than at any time in so-called class-ridden, uptight and elitist Britain. And this was not in some forsaken prairie in Wyoming, but in "urbane bohemian" lower Manhattan and "the centre of the gay universe", the Castro. Wearing camo gear and sporting a shaved head was not de rigueur there during the late 1980s - too subcultural, too fetishistic, whatever, it fitted in badly in those rigid beige compartments: the clone look, the western look, the preppy look. Unlike nowadays of course, when even women are starting to complain their men look like faggots: a Marine haircut, square-jawed and blockheaded.
But despite all this invasion of gay looks, styles and sense (more queer eye - the Ivorean, Tongan or Uzbek editions, anyone?) into the cultural mainstream, radical gender or sex politics, as in fucking with icons and meaning, is out, and "culture wars" and marriage aspirations are in.
Liberating male iconography from its perceived sexual orientation - as in all cowboys, soldiers, oil men and sports stars are straight and you fuck with that at your own risk - has been Mark Simpson's major theme in his columns, books and commentary.
So when he reviewed the latest Hollywood attempt to convince middle America there is a love that dares not speak its name on the prairie, I had to sit up and take notice. I don't think I will rush to my local cinema to watch Brokeback Mountain any time soon. If it's as boring as he makes it sound, I'm with the Hun's cartoon character Siggi who can't resist asking when introduced to a frathouse: "When does the fucking start around here?".
I think I will stick with that absolutely wonderfully funny Andy Warhol movie Lonesome Cowboys instead: after watching that one in my youth I have to admit I tried a tassled jacket on for size.
Every time I have been to America - only twice for more than one night's stay - it has been a disappointing and depressing experience: I've encountered far more snobbery and contempt for the way I looked, dressed or talked in the USA than at any time in so-called class-ridden, uptight and elitist Britain. And this was not in some forsaken prairie in Wyoming, but in "urbane bohemian" lower Manhattan and "the centre of the gay universe", the Castro. Wearing camo gear and sporting a shaved head was not de rigueur there during the late 1980s - too subcultural, too fetishistic, whatever, it fitted in badly in those rigid beige compartments: the clone look, the western look, the preppy look. Unlike nowadays of course, when even women are starting to complain their men look like faggots: a Marine haircut, square-jawed and blockheaded.
But despite all this invasion of gay looks, styles and sense (more queer eye - the Ivorean, Tongan or Uzbek editions, anyone?) into the cultural mainstream, radical gender or sex politics, as in fucking with icons and meaning, is out, and "culture wars" and marriage aspirations are in.
Liberating male iconography from its perceived sexual orientation - as in all cowboys, soldiers, oil men and sports stars are straight and you fuck with that at your own risk - has been Mark Simpson's major theme in his columns, books and commentary.
So when he reviewed the latest Hollywood attempt to convince middle America there is a love that dares not speak its name on the prairie, I had to sit up and take notice. I don't think I will rush to my local cinema to watch Brokeback Mountain any time soon. If it's as boring as he makes it sound, I'm with the Hun's cartoon character Siggi who can't resist asking when introduced to a frathouse: "When does the fucking start around here?".
I think I will stick with that absolutely wonderfully funny Andy Warhol movie Lonesome Cowboys instead: after watching that one in my youth I have to admit I tried a tassled jacket on for size.
January 20, 2006
Whale Rider
Since Little Britain was out of stock at the video store, we got Whale Rider instead. A "spiritual tale", which set off my alarm bells but hey, since it was a New Zealand movie, I thought I should have a look.
If you have seen this film outside New Zealand I presume you know next to nothing about Maori culture (many Maori say that even whiteys in New Zealand know nowt about it). So I'm a bit apprehensive what sort of message you would get from this film what Maori is all about: sexism, family breakups, violence, poverty, all mixed in with religious and ancestor-based hocus pocus.
Not a good look, really, and it all begs the question whether all this is thus worth preserving, or worse, reviving? I guess that's a question applicable to all social systems that place more emphasis on preserving the social order of male dominance and peddling spiritual claptrap, in order to prevent progress, social justice and, basically, a way out.
If you are inclined to tut-tut any attempt to reform traditional culture, please bear in mind that refusing to sit in the back row as a female at Maori events and protesting about it is a sackable offence.
If you wondered what Maori culture is like without the spiritual component, but with the preservation of the sexism and male violence, try Once Were Warriors instead.
Totty award: Roimata Taimana (Hemi's dad, in those fabulous vinyl trousers. Way to go, mate!)
If you have seen this film outside New Zealand I presume you know next to nothing about Maori culture (many Maori say that even whiteys in New Zealand know nowt about it). So I'm a bit apprehensive what sort of message you would get from this film what Maori is all about: sexism, family breakups, violence, poverty, all mixed in with religious and ancestor-based hocus pocus.
Not a good look, really, and it all begs the question whether all this is thus worth preserving, or worse, reviving? I guess that's a question applicable to all social systems that place more emphasis on preserving the social order of male dominance and peddling spiritual claptrap, in order to prevent progress, social justice and, basically, a way out.
If you are inclined to tut-tut any attempt to reform traditional culture, please bear in mind that refusing to sit in the back row as a female at Maori events and protesting about it is a sackable offence.
If you wondered what Maori culture is like without the spiritual component, but with the preservation of the sexism and male violence, try Once Were Warriors instead.
Totty award: Roimata Taimana (Hemi's dad, in those fabulous vinyl trousers. Way to go, mate!)
January 18, 2006
The Golden Stud
Now is your chance to choose Belgium's sexiest footballer (as in the round ball version). The candidates and pictures are here.No contest, really. Looking at Frederic Dupre I will have to bang my dick in the car door to make it go down again.
I bet bath time at SV Zulte-Waregem is far more fun than the on-pitch action.
Look at those freckles!
And just who is the lucky boy that shaves him? It's the only job worth having in football.
UPDATE: Our boy didn't win. Jamaique Vandamme did. I can live with that.
January 13, 2006
January 11, 2006
Sex and the military
In an attempt to impose Christo-Islamic-Judaic family values on his military, President Bush has made, by executive order,
Everybody knows that an army and navy fights better when it has access to R&R of the comforting kind (I have always considered myself a friendly port), so this order is surely another blow to the morale of the American forces.
And the funny thing is, Osama-Bin-Forgotten would wholeheartedly endorse such a prohibition. His suicide bombers, and Muslim boys in general, are manipulated and kept in check by sexual frustration: from the promise of their share of virgins in paradise to the total dissing of the sunbathing girls by Sydney "Lebs".
But you've got to wonder what all those horny army boys think they are fighting for and whether they will now think it's actually worth the effort.
I, for one, will not shirk my patriotic duty of servicing any guy in uniform, for free, because I am not cheap.
An intriguing final sentence in the news report reads:
Item via Democratic Veteran
patronizing a prostitute by enlisted personnel an offence with a punishment of up to a year in prison, forfeiture of pay and dishonorable discharge.It's done under the guise of combating the trafficking of people for prostitution and to change the mindset of the military that condones prostitution and related activities.
Everybody knows that an army and navy fights better when it has access to R&R of the comforting kind (I have always considered myself a friendly port), so this order is surely another blow to the morale of the American forces.
And the funny thing is, Osama-Bin-Forgotten would wholeheartedly endorse such a prohibition. His suicide bombers, and Muslim boys in general, are manipulated and kept in check by sexual frustration: from the promise of their share of virgins in paradise to the total dissing of the sunbathing girls by Sydney "Lebs".
But you've got to wonder what all those horny army boys think they are fighting for and whether they will now think it's actually worth the effort.
I, for one, will not shirk my patriotic duty of servicing any guy in uniform, for free, because I am not cheap.
An intriguing final sentence in the news report reads:
Marines are briefed by their commanders, especially those who are deploying overseas, that they should not engage in prostitution.Does this mean they are not to charge either anymore?
Item via Democratic Veteran
January 10, 2006
Hollywood only makes liberal movies
He's a human killing machine. Taught to stalk. Trained to kill. Programmed to destroy. He's played by their rules... Until now.Tagline for "Red Scorpion". Produced by Jack Abramoff. Yup, that one.
January 06, 2006
When you're through with eating turkey (or the holidays)
Aussielicious has issued a challenge on his blog to send him naked self-pictures taken in preferably in as-well-known-as-possible public locations. The series so far is quite riveting (if somewhat work unsafe) and my favourite is the guy who stripped off at the Queens Museum and Flushing Meadows Memorial.
I must think of a place to have my picture taken. Our nude beach really doesn't count because everyone is naked there so there is no challenge.
UPDATE: Thank you, Bloggreen, for the Andy Roddick pic reference. I better post it before the paper takes it offline. Playing nude tennis sure qualifies in my book!
I must think of a place to have my picture taken. Our nude beach really doesn't count because everyone is naked there so there is no challenge.
UPDATE: Thank you, Bloggreen, for the Andy Roddick pic reference. I better post it before the paper takes it offline. Playing nude tennis sure qualifies in my book!
Unsafe sex, DVDs and censorship
Further on the barebacking in porn videos issue, as a coincidence, the Office of Film & Literature Classification, i.e. The Censor, commissioned research on the attitude of porn viewers towards (I presume heterosexual) unprotected sex depicted in porn videos. The full research report is available in [PDF] format.
Bill Hastings is a lawyer from Canada and he is gay. Him being the chief censor is such a delicious expression of (depending on your point of view):
- New Zealand's inability to trust its own citizens to decide what they can watch or read;
- New Zealand political correctness gone mad by appointing the gay fox to guard the henhouse of Christian civilisation;
- New Zealand's liberal attitude in tolerating members of minority groups to apply and interpret the law.
I have met Bill a few times and a very amiable and jolly fellow he is, but I don't envy him his job at all: the Christian bigots can be terribly illogical in their criticism of his office's decisions. They object to sex on screen such as in films like "Anatomy of Hell", which shows nothing but good old-fashioned lovemaking, while they lobbied actively to have the age restrictions lowered on a dirge like "The Passion" so their kids could watch the most atrocious violence and torture.
I have also met one of his predecessors, Jane Wrightson, who is currently CEO of the Broadcasting Standards Authority, and with whom I have to deal professionally on occasion. She and I were at a seminar in the early 1990s on film censorship and we had a spirited discussion on the merits of her banning Pasolini's film "Salo", a film which I had seen several times in Europe, and for the life of me could not understand why other New Zealanders were not allowed to watch it. The only reason I can see to ban it would be for being such a bore but then 99% of all cinematic output would be in danger too. (The film has since been un-banned here in NZ)
The people who found on-screen unsafe sex inappropriate had five broad opinions:I've written to the Chief Censor, Bill Hastings, on any implication in the classification of DVDs and whether the gay barebacking videos will be included or singled out for special treatment (which may see them banned for "being injurious to the public good", the main legal phrase to ban films). Here's what he wrote back to me:
* It was wrong or did not portray a good image of sex movies.
* It was a bad example.
* It could increase the risk of sexually transmitted diseases among actors.
* Porn film-makers were hypocritical by prefacing their movies with health warnings promoting safe sex but not demonstrating it.
* The adult movie industry had a responsibility to promote safe sex.
Hi Hans,
Nice to hear from you, and thank you for your thoughtful message. I am in the process of writing a small media-digestible options paper for our website on this, but the option you suggest, an “R18 – contains unsafe sex scenes” label, seems the most sensible option to me at this stage. I agree that an outright ban is likely to create huge compliance issues, but I also think it would be legally defensible on the ground, as you say, that such videos are likely to injure the public good by undermining public health initiatives. We legally only need to establish a likelihood, not actual proof, and our research does seem to indicate that people believe unsafe sex videos might encourage viewers to have unsafe sex. It is much easier to disclose an opinion about other people than to disclose a fact about one’s own behaviour though. I don’t know whether people would ever be honest enough to disclose that they actually did engage in unsafe behaviour as a result of watching an unsafe sex video, or that a questionnaire could be developed to maximise the likelihood of an honest response one way or the other. But I keep an open mind.
As for your question about gay videos, our research did not specifically include them, but it did not exclude them either. Of the 110 people interviewed in Wellington and Hawke’s Bay over two years, 20 were non-heterosexual, and many answers reveal more than a passing familiarity with gay sex videos. One of the comments I made to the Herald reporter that she did not print was that a consequence of banning unsafe sex videos would be that the composition of the market would shift dramatically in favour of gay sex videos because the vast majority of heterosexual sex videos depict only unsafe sexual behaviour, particularly in the form of anal penetration without a condom.
You can download a copy of the research. I’ve also bookmarked your blog. Stay in touch, and happy new year.
Bill.
Bill Hastings is a lawyer from Canada and he is gay. Him being the chief censor is such a delicious expression of (depending on your point of view):
- New Zealand's inability to trust its own citizens to decide what they can watch or read;
- New Zealand political correctness gone mad by appointing the gay fox to guard the henhouse of Christian civilisation;
- New Zealand's liberal attitude in tolerating members of minority groups to apply and interpret the law.
I have met Bill a few times and a very amiable and jolly fellow he is, but I don't envy him his job at all: the Christian bigots can be terribly illogical in their criticism of his office's decisions. They object to sex on screen such as in films like "Anatomy of Hell", which shows nothing but good old-fashioned lovemaking, while they lobbied actively to have the age restrictions lowered on a dirge like "The Passion" so their kids could watch the most atrocious violence and torture.
I have also met one of his predecessors, Jane Wrightson, who is currently CEO of the Broadcasting Standards Authority, and with whom I have to deal professionally on occasion. She and I were at a seminar in the early 1990s on film censorship and we had a spirited discussion on the merits of her banning Pasolini's film "Salo", a film which I had seen several times in Europe, and for the life of me could not understand why other New Zealanders were not allowed to watch it. The only reason I can see to ban it would be for being such a bore but then 99% of all cinematic output would be in danger too. (The film has since been un-banned here in NZ)
January 03, 2006
Summer holiday reading
Having Fun: a short story, I presume completely auto-biographical, about being gay and young in 1950s Britain. A hugely enjoyable read. It reminded me of my own younger days of fumbling with straight/confused guys in a vain attempt at sexual intimacy while exploring, discovering and dealing with my own bent-ness. But it all came out in the wash, eventually.
Never despair and never fear, it's what young queers should learn.
UPDATE: Michael Gouda, the author, sent me the link to his website with other gay short stories he has written.
Never despair and never fear, it's what young queers should learn.
UPDATE: Michael Gouda, the author, sent me the link to his website with other gay short stories he has written.
January 02, 2006
New year resolutions
I must:
1. Increase the truly pathetic average number of sexual partners a New Zealander has in a year.
2. Exercise more. (Can anyone recommend me a good gym, preferably one where you don't have to wear clothes, as the ancient Greeks did)
3. Find a way, or rather, ways, to combine points 1 and 2. (A sex club with a gym would be ideal)
1. Increase the truly pathetic average number of sexual partners a New Zealander has in a year.
2. Exercise more. (Can anyone recommend me a good gym, preferably one where you don't have to wear clothes, as the ancient Greeks did)
3. Find a way, or rather, ways, to combine points 1 and 2. (A sex club with a gym would be ideal)
January 01, 2006
The great holiday rip-off
New Year's Day is called a statutory holiday here and the Government's employment and holiday legislation awards workers on those days a 50% extra on their wage, plus a day off in lieu later. With wages being so low in New Zealand this isn't such a big deal in the greater scheme of things, but some eateries, who consider themselves a cut above the rest of the fast food chains, use this law to put a surcharge of 15% of more on their normal prices for a meal out. These businesses are obviously unviable economically if they cannot absorb normal labour costs in their budget.
So this morning, passing by Occam Cafe in Grey Lynn, favoured haunt of minor soap stars and women's magazine celebrity gossip columnists, seeing their billboard with their absurd justification ("Due to Government legislation... blah blah blah") for a 15% price hike, I just laughed and marvelled at the punters who didn't mind being ripped off - their food today certainly isn't 15% better quality nor is the service, since the queues at the counter were even longer than on other days - suckers are born every day.
Other businesses running today, such as the supermarket, corner dairy, bus company and many others, don't have this surcharge and function profitably. The bus company actually surcharges by putting on a truly decrepit holiday service, which in effect is the same as a price hike.
Greed is good, capitalism says, but that doesn't mean we'll have to take it bent over.
So this morning, passing by Occam Cafe in Grey Lynn, favoured haunt of minor soap stars and women's magazine celebrity gossip columnists, seeing their billboard with their absurd justification ("Due to Government legislation... blah blah blah") for a 15% price hike, I just laughed and marvelled at the punters who didn't mind being ripped off - their food today certainly isn't 15% better quality nor is the service, since the queues at the counter were even longer than on other days - suckers are born every day.
Other businesses running today, such as the supermarket, corner dairy, bus company and many others, don't have this surcharge and function profitably. The bus company actually surcharges by putting on a truly decrepit holiday service, which in effect is the same as a price hike.
Greed is good, capitalism says, but that doesn't mean we'll have to take it bent over.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)