September 02, 2008

Sign here if you want to be gay at the ball

A rather odd news story occurred over the weekend involving schools wanting gay students to sign "contracts" if they want to bring a same sex partner to the school ball:
"Four Auckland colleges do not allow same-gender ball partners unless pupils sign contracts stating their sexual orientation."
I'm a bit confused as to what this contract is for and why on earth you would want to sign it. What does it actually say? Will the schools provide extra goods and services to contractors? A free condom and lube and Champagne, Champagne for everyone, darling? Complementary tickets to either Kylie or Becks?
And pray tell, is there also a contract for heterosexuals pledging they won't have unsafe sex, unwanted pregnancies or wear naff ball gowns? And not to turn gay after the Champagne, Champagne for everyone, darling!

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